Life can’t be that hard, right?
If you develop bad habits and find yourself in the same places as before, where you aren’t proud of your achievements, it can negatively impact your life.
I’ve been in some bad places, and the only way to get out of them was to apply some rules into my life and respect.
This way, I would build more healthy habits that I could rely on when tough times would come.
To make life simpler, you can follow some of these rules.
Your only competition is who you were yesterday
“Living one’s life as if it is a competition between oneself and others is an inevitable path to a stressful life.”
You are comparing yourself to people who you don’t really know very well, which means you only see their shiny outsides but not the reality of their life.
The following few phrases will be a bit harsh to read and may wake some feelings in you, so BEWARE.
Jordan Peterson said:
“One day you see someone in a Porsche on the driveway and say to yourself, “Oh, wow, he’s so lucky to have such a car,” but the truth of the matter is that he might be thinking about how he’s going to battle his wife’s cancer, or how can he run the car in the next tree that he comes close to.
You can’t tell how hard someone’s life is, and even people who seem like they got their life together may have problems to fight off.
So the idea that makes you jealous or resentful is in large part an illusion that’s created by your own mind.
Many extremely healthy or wealthy people may have a burden of responsibilities that would crush the typical person—working 90 hours a week, having thousand of people depending on them, plus their personal problems.
There’s a price to be paid for everything.
You have to be careful what you’re comparing yourself to because you don’t really know what it is.”
You have to understand that you are different from everyone else. You have your own path to walk. You’re learning things every day, and you are on the right track. Everybody has their own story to complete, and by comparing yourself to others, you only slow down your process.
Nobody is like you. They don’t have your problems, your life, your family, your perspective on life. They don’t have your abilities, your intelligence, your uniqueness. So don’t worry about others.
Now concentrate the energy on yourself. Become a better version of yourself every day. You could:
- Begin meditating or meditate a little longer;
- Start going to the gym and see results every week;
- Read more pages than the day before;
- Learn a new language/new words every day;
- Run a 5k;
- Begin building healthy habits.
You could do so many things to improve yourself instead of wasting your energy comparing yourself to others and stagnating. Let’s not do that. Let’s build our own stories so other people can look up to us instead.
Do the things you want to do; the others don’t matter.
Earn, save & invest before you spend
Before saving and investing, you need a way to earn money.
Here is where your 9-5 comes into place, but everybody has to start somewhere.
Some people love their jobs, and some people don’t.
Some side hustles for you to try:
- Become a freelance writer;
- Start a blog;
- Become a virtual assistant;
- Become a dog walker and pet sitter;
- Sell your used items to make money without a job;
- Become a transcriber;
- Make YouTube or TikTok videos;
- Rent out your home on Airbnb;
- Start a coaching business.
To invest your money, you need to save your money and not spend it mindlessly on pointless things that give you a sense of happiness for 2-3 days/weeks.
So to save your money, start doing these:
- Record your expenses – Keep track of your expenses, meaning everything you buy from coffee to tips;
- Budget for saving – Once you have an idea of what you spend monthly, you can organize your expenses. Don’t overspend.
- Find ways to cut your spendings – If you are overspending, then it might come to cut off your nonessentials, such as entertainment, coffee, and dining out.
- Set savings goals – This is one of the best ways to save money. Begin by thinking about what you want to save for (investing, a car, a house, etc.), then figure out how much money you will need and how long it might take to save it.
- Priorities – After your expenses and income, your goals will have the most significant impact on how you allocate your savings.
- Make savings automatic – Banks offer automated transfers between your checking and saving account. You can choose when, how much and where to transfer the money you want to save.
- Watch your savings grow – Review and check on your progress monthly.
Now that your savings are growing, the next step can be investing it in your goals, passions, courses, or whatever will improve the quality of your life.
- You can start a side hustle;
- Pay your student loans or other high-interest debt;
- Start contributing to a 401k or an IRA;
- Start an eCommerce business;
- Equipment for a blog/youtube channel;
Avoid negative people – Life is too short
There’s a saying.
“Stay away from negative people; they have a problem for every solution.”
This might not be true for everything in life. The point is that you should limit your time with people who drain your energy and add no value to your life.
Negative people are really committed to being negative, and it’s not their fault. If they don’t want to be helped, then don’t make it your job to get them out of their misery.
I’ve met people who would argue about everything in their lives, even what other people are doing and why and it became frustrating quickly. I had to cut them off.
This doesn’t mean you don’t have to treat them with compassion and empathy, but keep your life out of their drama and negativity.
Everybody has their path; they will get out of their negativity when the time comes or when they will learn their lesson, and there’s not much you can do about it.
Everyone comes into your life for a reason, a blessing, or a lesson.
“Don’t chase people. Be yourself. Do your own thing and work hard. The right people, the ones who really belong in your life will come to you and stay.” – Will Smith
The people in your life should be reducing your stress, not causing more of it. Don’t let them drain your energy. Everything is energy. If you put your energy into negative people, your life will be negative.
Surround yourself with people who make you feel good about yourself.
Your friends are a great reflection of you because you chose them. Choose wisely.
But say thank you to all the toxic people in your life. If they didn’t appreciate you, they taught you how you must not be treated, and they taught you how not to treat others.
If they let you go, they showed you that you could move on. If they made you feel unworthy for a moment, they showed you that none could ever take the life from you long term; they gave you strength and character.
Don’t let someone stop you from becoming your greatest self.
You’re more than one event. Use whatever happened to your advantage, don’t let them win by holding on. Let their toxic energy stay with them and release it from your life.
Say “thank you!”. For the lessons, for the blessings, for the strength to move on.
Go after what you want
If you don’t go after what you want, you will never get it.
What do you want from your life? Where do you want to be in the next six months?
You have probably thought about those questions before but let’s see the other side. Where do you not want to be in the next six months? What are you willing to sacrifice to get there? Do you want to be in the same place in a year, or do you want a change?
Ask yourself, “Where do I wanna be?”, “Where I do not want to be?”. When you understand the importance of your motivation, that’s going to push you forward.
What keeps you from being focused right now? Social media? Your Phone? Procrastination? Get rid of the triggers.
When you’re waiting and waiting and waiting for the rocket to get started, to launch and lift off into space, what happens? 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, and it launches. I want you to use the same analogy when you want to get started with something.
5, 4, 3, 2, 1, and you start reading; you begin studying, go to the gym, and go for a walk. Just do the required things for you to be in the perfect place at the end of these six months.
See fail as a beginning, not as an end
You are supposed to fail because failure is the stepping stone to success.
Failure is an experience that leads to wisdom, which ultimately will make you a stronger version of yourself.
The worst thing you could do is quit. But you cannot quit.
Just because you fail, it doesn’t make you a failure, and you have to understand this.
Every time something doesn’t work, it will simply add to your journey. You will grow stronger; you will learn something, discover something.
Focusing on failures and rejections are distractions from your goals. Failures show us where we need to pivot, adjust, and improve. Learn from your failures and grow from them.
Fail is necessary for your character development, so keep failing until you make it.
Your habits decide your future
“People do not decide their futures; they decide their habits, and their habits decide their futures.” – F. Matthias Alexander.
Choose your habits carefully, because they decide your future.
You are what you repeatedly do every day. A dream will be just a dream until you focus on your habit.
A thought converts to a word, which manifests as action. An action repeated a sufficient number of times becomes a habit. The habit then defines one’s character, and character determines destiny or the future. Thus, if a single thought can affect the future, a habit, a much more powerful tool, can affect one’s future much more.
Habits affect not only your private life but also your finances, your social life, your relationships, your work or business, your personal growth… everything. So whether you want to make a tiny shift or take a massive, gigantic, life-changing step – you should start with your habits!